Not so sweet dreams
My boyfriend sent me this text:
“I forgot to tell you. Last night I had lemon cake ice cream. Watched the departed! The movie and went to bed. I had such a crazy nightmare of small shadow people trying to get me coming into the room. I woke up screaming at them to get out and bumped my head on the door while trying to escape my room. Then I realized it was an ice cream sugar nightmare. My head was rose color when I woke up in the morning”
Me: “Omg! That's terrible. And funny. Can this go in my blog?
Him: Yes that's exactly where it belongs
Me: Was it that low calorie ice cream?
Him: Yes
It’s called Halo Top Creamery and it really is awesome. Low calorie, low sugar and high protein. Maybe just not right before bedtime.
I’m glad I wasn’t there that night because other people’s nightmares are scary to witness but thery’re also terribly funny and I’m prone to inappropriate solo laughing fits during times of stress.
For whatever reason, ice cream gives some people nightmares. Seems like high carbohydrate meals in general either give you a deep carbo-coma sleep where you are too sluggish to wake up for even important matters or you’re fighting flying diapers with a ball point pen type nightmares. The aforementioned is what I call a “white out”.
When I was about twelve I fell asleep post-sugar while my brother and my best friend Lisa were still awake. I was having a math nightmare and yelled out “The remainder is ten!”. They laughed really loud.
While I was still asleep, I very clearly told my brother to get me “Paper, pencil and a ruler”. Of course they burst out in laughter however in my sleepor (that’s a sleep stupor), it really ticked me off. I leapt off the couch into the dark kitchen where my mom had an unplugged sauna (meant for her massage office but it seemed to have been in the kitchen for awhile). I opened up the sauna and sat inside, unplugged.
When my brother and Lisa turned on the kitchen, they could barely stand up as they were overcome with laugher. This disrespect enraged me as not only a sleep walker and sleep talker but as a sleep steamer. I kicked the door open and stormed off to my bedroom. That house was haunted by the way, but mostly by me.